上次作文Thesis statement的问题, As a result, horrible Internet games expose children to cyber bullying, perversely shape juveniles’ personality, values and attitudes, and stimulate juveniles’ imaginations towards crime. 在parallel construction里面,短语之间的语法形式要求一致,这一点在SAT写作部分的挑错单元最常考。在写thesis的时候,最忌讳出错,会扣很多分,所以应该尽量避免redundancy。可以改成, As a result, horrible Internet games breed cyber bullying and crime disposition, which perversely shape juveniles’ personality, values and attitudes.- c- D( w0 O( L# Z* Z7 {+ f