 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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* U+ c: ], j# r# Z- d7 P. E6 t- EI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:5 F. K4 W7 `0 i& q- x4 \. T1 B
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"& e: i2 o2 S5 H8 y8 e: a8 M
9 K) n* b5 U. x$ w3 u m! R' Y) E* II was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?2 ~& E8 u/ p- l' Y, M
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And the second one was:4 h7 n' q4 o3 G: C* l* N
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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+ ~- ^% F5 o$ j4 X2 C2 m; GI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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' Z; U& }3 u- C- P, y% b( [I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?# w8 D- r. x& ] P3 y. `
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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, k! R# V/ L! Z7 ?' R( j5 LI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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1 w6 v+ V# d, _* S: [* i* lSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"3 n& q/ `0 B& E
% R* P8 V( K/ }- W0 |' CNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”* C/ x a, }, H
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.' d, X! I- ?' R3 f9 \
M2 L5 j4 R5 ?2 U6 G9 u9 k6 k# aThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:: I }# s) p& \3 S3 a
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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4 A. Y0 ~& S- Y2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.. F3 s2 y+ n# M o; W" C7 W
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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1 q- U% _9 \7 JJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".# L& ^" r) f$ {$ O+ c
7 l- D' I# M& R& qRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
