 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.1 t2 Y7 j9 e5 Z; Q, i2 i6 Y
* {* U; u& C' X o% C4 b1 R6 kI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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3 m% o0 {. y; Q+ L# M& O, XI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.0 K- w3 I( k& t) T
; m: W9 }! v% \$ G+ F2 w$ H+ }6 L# gI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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2 J; G' {+ Y+ |3 h"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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6 H& g3 @3 B; k+ f9 J9 s. B. tI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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1 a5 Z$ j( y7 ?/ j) FAnd the second one was:8 L; U0 W3 f) `* c' r
2 ^ |. C# X7 {# Z5 e"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed? z i2 H- t/ q1 R9 V4 C5 k, E9 F
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?" |+ @5 ]2 q0 h* g6 _( ?% q% q7 `
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!2 z, y9 H- s( U9 L9 k
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."" I- E- o2 c: R! }
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"3 M8 V' ~9 C" A+ ~3 {( k9 p
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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- ~' P6 O; E6 L& q# a5 A- CThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.- N7 U9 H2 g* h3 {9 W: a+ S
! f6 F' s" G4 Q1 Q9 R! j% `Thank you very much!7 C. v- A5 X. H3 L. G# H7 j' _. }
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- B; m! i" T. l# u/ ]( ?Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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2 r. V1 }# j4 C/ e( B1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.+ y# T9 y. L3 x$ w2 g6 v& |
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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- L& q; d* y1 Q) |8 ~# p9 qJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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. S$ F5 x( i, p/ j, K1 LThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
